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The Masked Singer Is Playing With Our Patience

The Masked Singer, Niecy NashWatch: Jenny McCarthy on If Donnie Wahlberg Would Do "Masked Singer"

We knew this was going to happen, and yet we're still sort of mad about it. 


The Masked Singer just unmasked yet another celebrity, but not really. They did, but they also didn't, ya know? Mostly, what they did was play a trick on us, just a few episodes after they had Kermit the Frog—a puppet—pop out of a giant snail. This time, they introduced a new "wild card" contestant, in the same vein as the Orca and the Crab.


The Bulldog appeared to be there to attempt to steal a place in the competition from one of the other contestants, but there was something sort of off about him. His voice was strange, and his costume was a whole lot less ornate than the others. It was essentially just a mask and a tracksuit—a nice tracksuit, sure, but not one that would win anybody any costume awards. 


Then, when it was time to vote for who deserved to stay in the competition, guest host Niecy Nash announced that she was actually just going to choose who would be taking off their mask, and it was the Bulldog. Then the Bulldog took off his mask and revealed himself to be...regular host Nick Cannon. 

photosSpring 2021 TV Premiere Dates

The panel was really stunned and the fake audience was fake stunned, and it was a pretty funny, on brand moment for this show, but it also feels accurate to call it a complete waste of time. The whole point of watching these episodes is to not just guess who the celebrities are, but to be rewarded with a reveal at the end. Nick Cannon was never a real contestant! He's the host! 

Fox

We're not really mad at this, but we're a little mad. There was barely even time to wonder who the Bulldog was before he was forced to unmask, and then it was like, "Oh, Nick Cannon." 


Fans have theorized for weeks that Nick might have been hiding under a mask, especially since Fox was never able to give a firm answer on when he'd return to the show after recovering from COVID-19. It would have been pretty funny but also in very poor taste if Nick had actually been a contestant from the beginning, but at least it would have felt like a satisfying reveal. Did they plan this whole wild card thing just so Nick could do this? 


Could they not eliminate two singers tonight, to make it feel like a bigger deal? 

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We're not mad, Masked Singer. Just disappointed. And maybe a little mad. Welcome back to the show, Nick Cannon! 


You can keep up with all the singers who are not Nick Cannon below. 

Jerod Harris/Getty Images; Michael Becker/FOXGrandpa Monster: Logan Paul

Whoever Grandpa Monster is, he's got a past he's trying to shake and he hates looking back on his younger days because he's done so much growing. Alarmingly, the two prevailing guesses online are Logan Paul and O.J. Simpson. The voice sounds way more like the latter. 


The panel guessed Scott Disick, Johnny Manziel and the Miz. 

Michael Becker/FOX, imageSPACE for the Mill Valley Film Festival/ShutterstockRaccoon: Danny Trejo

Once you know the Raccoon is Danny Trejo, you can't unhear it. There was also a donut in his first clue package, which should have been a dead giveaway for the actor-turned-donut seller. 

Michael Becker/FOX, John Salangsang/ShutterstockPhoenix: Caitlyn Jenner

Few masked singers have been quite as obvious as the Phoenix, who simply could not escape from Caitlyn Jenner's voice and mannerisms. She's been on TV too long to stay a mystery for very long at all. 

Michael Becker/FOX, Neilson Barnard/Getty Images for The Muppets StudioSnail: Kermit the Frog

We are still shook by this, TBH. The first unmasked singer of season five turned out to be Kermit the Frog, who is a muppet. Sure, he's a prolific star of movies and TV shows, but he is also still a puppet. Baffling! 

FoxRussian Dolls

The Russian Dolls are baffling. At first there appeared to be on, then a second appeared, and now there are three! They sound exactly like Hanson, and if they're not Hanson, we will eat a shoe. (No we won't.) 


Panel guesses have included Lady Antebellum, Boyz II Men, Vanessa Hudgens, Darren Criss, Matthew Morrison and Kevin McHale. 

FoxRobopine

According to his clues, the Robopine got a call from an angel that changed his life, and now he's on a new mission that no one can touch. He claimed to be 60, but none of the panelists believed him. He's clearly got a voice and some major talent, and if we're agreed that he's lying about his age, Tyrese Gibson could be a solid choice. MC Hammer is actually in his late 50s and would also make sense. 


Guesses included Ginuwine, Jamie Foxx and Lionel Richie. 

FoxSeashell

Seashell moved around with her family for most of her childhood, and has worn a lot of hats. If you ask the internet, it's Tamera Mowry and it's hard to disagree. 


Panel guesses included Hilary Duff, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jessica Simpson. Ken Jeong tried to guess Kristen Chenoweth and was praised by the rest of the panel, but she has one of the most recognizable voices in showbiz so we're not sure where he was going with that. 

FoxBlack Swan

Black Swan is clearly a fantastic singer who says she got caught up under a spell and hypnotized by a Hollywood deal she couldn't resist. She sounds like a grown up JoJo, who struggled under her original record deal for years before finally breaking free of it. 


The panelists, who have often guessed JoJo in the past, went with Anya Taylor Joy and Camila Cabello. 

FoxChameleon

The Chameleon is clearly a tall man and there were references to a "pit" and 007, which makes perfect sense for Wiz Khalifa. He's 6'4" and he's from Pittsburgh. He also has a thing for pitbulls, and has a song called "James Bong." 


Guesses included Redfoo, Diplo and even Nick Cannon, which would admittedly be a great trick. 

FoxPiglet

Despite a clue package filled with Bachelor references, the Piglet seems much more likely to be a boy bander. He sounds an awful lot like Nick Lachey, and his clues revealed that the world has seen his heart break, which we all did after the demise of his TV show with ex-wife Jessica Simpson. If it is actually someone from The Bachelor, then we've got to know who's been hiding that talent from us! 


Panelists guessed Adam Lambert, Liam Hemsworth and Charlie Puth, but none of those feel quite right.

The Masked Singer airs Wednesdays at 8 p.m. on Fox.

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